Tuesday, 15 November 2011

Pseudolph has a Shinar

From the Seer of Gibraltar, the Bard of the East, cometh this pre-Xmas offering in the spirit of Hislop's Two Babylons. Filled it is with cryptic references, and disturbing they be. In fact, I think a commentary might need to be written to explain such hidden depths as Old Dark Beer (the Pride of the South), the capitalised SIX-PACK (the Holy One of Edmond), and Koha (a word in te reo).

Yeah, okay, now we need a commentary to explain the explanations. Thus was it ever so Dunn.

Anyway, thankee koindly to the poet (lyricist, composer?) Appearing below is a somewhat redacted version of the original, one verse omitted, another two relocated under the influence of the Holy Spirit... something all biblical scholars know only adds to the sanctity of sacred psalmody, even if it makes a complete botch of it in the process. In compensation for such churlish butchery an equally cryptic picture has been chosen to accompany the text.

Pseudolph the Rude-Nosed Reindeer
Is coming along your way,
So leave him Old Dark Beer
On a thirsty Mythmas day.

High up on the ziggurat
A reddish light they mount
In honour of Pseudolph's nose
Whose lumens they cannot count.

They celebrate Semiramis
In the dead of Chaldea night,
Arrayed in their pyjamas
They look a sorry sight.


Mythmas is a Koha season,
A time for you to spend,
And so you need no reason
To give SIX-PACK a lend.

Or better still a freewill sum,
Given from the heart,
You needn't feel glum
As with that lot you part.

Pseudolph has a Shinar,
To his nose I do refer,
For nothing is seen finer
In the adobe houses of Ur.

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