Saturday, 5 November 2011

In Christ's Name

This thing is going viral at the moment. The hilarious thing is that Pastor Shade (first name 'Burke') is himself a defrocked Presbyterian minister - who then jumped ship from one schismastic body to another. In fact, among those of the Reformed persuasion there seem to be as many schisms as you'll find almost anywhere - acronyms included!

Pastor 'BS'
Now, for those of you who are more familiar with the term 'disfellowship' than 'excommunicate', and have a similar letter tucked away somewhere (or perhaps framed!)... don't you feel so much more 'mainline' knowing that Presbyterian clergy, using almost identical language, can equal the jerk factor along with the very best that the fringe can offer?

Thanks to Bill for the heads up.


  1. I don't get it....

  2. I wish I did have one of those to frame or to put on permanent display on my blog. But no, I didn't get the satisfaction of an excommunication or disfellowship certificate, letter or note, phone call or anything - cheap bastards.

  3. One wonders if Jesus Christ himself knows that the disfellowshipped person is no longer a Christian?

    Does this mean that God will no longer answer his prayers because Jesus is no longer his intercessor?

    He is being disfellowshipped for non attendance, but then isn't that redundant, since being disfellowshipped means that he can't attend?

    How long has Jesus Christ been trying to get into this particular sect? If he attended incognito, would he be kicked out too?

    And if Jesus Christ were not to recognize Cornerstone Christian Church as really being Christian, what would declaring the disfellowshipped man to no longer be a Christian mean, if they didn't know the meaning of "Christian" in the first place?

    Can these people prove they are Christians through exhibiting the fruit of the spirit, rather than the works of the flesh they are exhibiting now?

    Can these people know for sure that this person isn't attending a true Christian church elsewhere, and therefore really is not forsaking assembling with other believers? If he is, wouldn't trying to turn him over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh sort of be like, really really unfair and unjust and just plain wrong?

    Would Christians ever issue such a letter?

    Are sure that this isn't just about idolatry, spawned by covetousness of those who want his contributions and love his money?

  4. Dear Corky,

    The reason I didn't issue you a disfellowshipment certificate, letter, or even call you is because you were never converted in the first place, and I'm too busy trying to run the TRUE church than to waste my time trying to get you back into the fold. I'm gawd's apostle(jowls shaking)!!! I looked at your tithing record, and it doesn't look too good. Remember, where your treasure is, that's where your heart is. You didn't give me, er, I mean Jesus, your treasure. Also, your very SALVATION hinges upon you following the next Pastor General after I am gone.You just don't get it. We're in the gun lap and you're not even on the track, and I never said we were going to the Place of Safety. Oh, and you women...get rid of that makeup(jowls shaking)!!! I have to go now. I have to meet with world leaders and give them expensive gifts and tell them that I am an Ambassador without portfolio representing a strong hand from somewhere. You just don't get it, Corky.You went ahead and bought that refrigerator, clothes and shoes for your kids, while I needed that money for the carpet in the auditorium, Harvey's Bristol Cream, and Dom Perignon.

    In Jaeeeesus Name,
    Herbull Shit

  5. True Christians would never issue such a letter. See Corky, you should be singing the praises of your former congregation...

  6. I dunno, Larry, after the changes, when my family quit going, the pastor just called us up to whine....

  7. How can this guy call himself a servant of Jesus Christ and write such a letter? Where is that true Christian love which all shepherds are supposed to exude?

    What I see leaping off the letter is :

    Since you are not attending and giving me money, BUZZ OFF you evil thing. And don't let me catch you talking to any of my members!

    This pastor Shady is scum. I wonder what he does in his spare time behind closed doors.

  8. (Sigh!) Another minister who thinks it's his job to be Jesus' gatekeeper!


  9. You know, everyone I've discussed the power imbalance problems with, since I've been called back, has pretty much admitted that, the abuses of power that took place, had absolutely nothing whatsoever, to do with the doctrines of the Church, as they existed; in point of fact, I can recall the abuses of power getting worse after "the changes" not better.

    Fortunately, those power imbalances no longer exist. One is very hard-pressed, these days, to tell the ordained ministers/deacons/elders/etc from the actual members in the cheap seats...but that's definitely a good thing, IMO.

    The GRUMPs in the Church are distinctive in this respect, though not in a good way. They seem to have jettisoned most of the Church's original doctrines (which they ironically claim to hold fast to), whilst maintaining the power imbalances that took the Church down in the first place. Which, again, has nothing to do with the actual doctrines of the Church (which the GRUMPs have fallen away from, just as much as, if not moreso, than the Evangelicals).

    I've heard (by hearsay; I never witnessed this myself, though there are accounts on the Net of same) that those who didn't fall away after the changes, but who refused to go along with them, were DFed...and then "invited back" (or at least not denied entrance) when they returned.

    Speaking for myself. I came back to the Church making absolutely no bones about where I stand and what I believe, and I have had absolutely NO problems, whatsoever; not from my fellow members, not from ministers, no one. I have personally met members who have stayed on, all through the changes, without being DFed and without bending their knee to pagan idols.

    It's all about the attitude; we are to lead by example, after all, and what kind of example can you set, by being judgemental and insulting towards those who aren't meant to understand the truth in this lifetime, anyway?

    That doesn't make them bad people, far from it! The Church always taught that it was other religions that were corrupt, not individual religious believers, who could be, and often were, very sincere, and good people.

    It definitely behooves those of us who do still believe in and adhere to the "heterodox" teachings of the Church, to behave with MORE respect, kindness, and service to those around us, who might not necessarily share the same beliefs.

    Our Christian behaviour, in these instances, instructs those with the eyes to see (so to speak), by example, (NOT "by profession only") that "legalism" does NOT always produce "bitter fruits" (which has nothing to do with "legalism" and everything to do with the individual's own personal problems, IMO).

    By example, we are set upon this earth to instruct those who have been wrongfully conditioned to hate, belittle, and despise what they refer to as "legalism," that said "legalism" CAN actually improve one's life, improve one's bearing towards others, and provide a better hope for the future, than any other religion before or since.

    Well. That's the example I'm meant to set, anyway. Dunno if I get there, some days....