Sunday 10 April 2011

Oh man, am I outa the loop!

At least as far as developments are proceeding at Grace Communion International, formerly the Worldwide Church of God.

Now they're baptizing infants! Rarely have I found The Surprising God blog so surprising.
Grace Communion International (GCI), baptizes adult believers and their infant children.
Really!?!? Since when?

Ol' Herb Armstrong will now be rotating in his Pasadena Lawn Cemetery grave at nigh on twice the speed of sound.

Just look at the official eight-minute video, if you have a high pain threshhold. Does Douggie not know that he's forgotten his tie? Surely that makes the ceremony invalid in itself, nicht wahr? I see the dowdy old hall ambience has been faithfully maintained at least, along with the compulsion to over-talk everything.

First they ditch sabbatarianism, then chiliasm (millennialism), and now they're holding hands with those apostate baby christeners of Christendom?

I'm shocked, shocked!

Oh look! Ted has a quotation from God's Holy Apostle James Torrance! And another from Migliori. Well, THAT certainly settles it.

But why, dear CGI members, has all this reform not penetrated into the hierarchic structure of the church? Why is Joe Tkach still supreme High Poobah ("Pastor General") when...
  • He has no mandate
  • Nobody voted him in
  • His appointment was courtesy of his dad
  • He appoints the church board rather than the other way around
  • There are no checks and balances that seem to apply to him
  • He pleads "episcopacy" in a church which first started using that language in 1979 as a way of weaseling out of legal accountability to the State of California
In conclusion, a word-for-word quote from former WCG minister John Comino, delivered from the pulpit of the Hamilton, NZ church many years ago. The subject: a sensitive reference to infant baptism as it is practised by the Whore of Babylon and her Protestant daughter churches...
Plinkety plonk, plinkety plonk
Hope this makes hair
Grow on your bonk.
Ah, the good old days...


  1. Why is Joe Tkach still supreme High Poobah? I can sum up the bulleted list in one word: Cult.

  2. Given enough time GCI will work itself back up the "historical faith" daisy chain to the point where Joe Jr can wear fish mitre hats and his ministers dress in black. Maybe he can even have his own Swiss guard!

    When Joe gets old and slumps in Pastor-General-mobile mumbling sweet Jesus to himself, the pius clergy will gather to choose a new Vicar for Christ.

    Bloggers will report followers gathering on the sunny side of 2011 East Financial Way, waiting to see what color of smoke emerges from the Holy paper shreder.

  3. I attended services with them one Saturday last year. What a confused failed mess.

  4. I find it rather amusing that in all the years that I have been associated with the WCG/GCI, and all the questions that I have been asked by so many folks, I have never, never, ever been asked about the "leadership hierarchy" of the Church. Not even once.

    This seems to be a frequent topic of discussion among "ex-members", to the point of obsession. But, normal people really don't care. And, this is not only not discussed inside the Church, it is not even considered worthy of concern.

  5. Which just goes to show, Larry, that those with "get-up-'n-go" have got up and gone.

  6. What a wonderful way to boost those baptized member counts!

    Where once a family of 4 counted as 2 baptized members, it now counts as 4!

  7. Is this a case of bringing in the baby with the Barth-water (where "h" represents the argument from silence)? Moves towards orthopraxy are commendable, but the modus operandi remains truly perplexing.

  8. The Third Witness said...

    Is this a case of bringing in the baby with the Barth-water (where "h" represents the argument from silence)? Moves towards orthopraxy are commendable, but the modus operandi remains truly perplexing.

    Perhaps it is a case of ceremony from parapraxis!